Bored.
ok let me first start off with what;s been happening in the past few days that i dint uodate my blog.. i dint go werk/school on monday and tuesday.. last fri sat and sunday had shows and rehearsals. breakfast at UCC -- University Cultural Centre.. beside NUS. the food was great, buffet eat all u want. ok sunday's show.. nothing much for me. not presuurising not a bit scary. just sat there sang two songs with the rest of the choir. but i shud say that the whole even was brought down nicely. i mean those who went to see what the concert was all about would have had a pleasent time watching with thier whoever. but overall i would rate the whole thing 8/10. marking includes, quality of show, lighting, atmosphere, costume, micing and so on so forth. btw 8/10 is very high for me.
ok next the past two days.. i gave been doing nothing but BUM! thats all.. im just to lazy to do any housewerk nor do anything else. cos i think my mind is switched off after Perdana and few shows after that. even yest i went dwon to cc to see them train, i dint even sing a little bit nor hit any of the percussions. just sat there and stare at their blur faces.. haha.. dunno just o lazy.. maybe the next biggest show i have to prepare for is HARI RAYA! paint hse.. clean hse.. CLEAN HSE is a major thing i shud say.. buy clothes.. make kuih.. MAKE KUIH?? sorry i dont do that.. i just eat them. just so many thing to do man..
sometimes its gets to bored till i cant sleep. i mean cant sleep till 7 in the morning an i SUPPOSEDLY have to reach work at 8.30am. which i never do. heh.. i dunno ah life seems bored this few days. i have things to do and sometimes nothing to do. but i am just too LAZY!!! hah thats the word.. hope this laziness wont last long. this few days alot of frens come to me when they have problems. i REPEAT.. when they have problems. when their problems go away i would go away to.. so sad rite.. not for me. better.. so they wont bug me. i dint mention anyone did i... so ok no. just wanna make it clear down hear that i REALLY2 hate liars and hyprocrites.. i just so FFFFFFF hate them! i just got to know someone hu is one. a BIG hyprocrite. yet that person** (**lets call that person pussy cat) still dowan to tell me what pussy is keeping something from me that i should AND have the right to know cos its involving me. and pussy cat thinks that i dont know what is happening ard me.. HA HA HA anyway i got the info from a good fren.. thanks ya gud fren! hehe.. alright.. ill play along to tat game.. im sure it'll be FUN!! wowhooooOOO~~ im sure some of u are lost to what ive just type.. nvm its ok.. its for ppl hu noe.. weEEeeeeEEEe~ alrite peeps i need to go now.. finish up editing my audio'SSS k bye. anyway i type this lest that 5 minutes. im sure there lots of typos but im just lazy to check.k bye. watch out pussy!
11 more days!
i first started blogging when i first started my attachment. that was nearly 4 months back when shahsa teng teng help me with this blog.. haha thanks ah eh.. neway its going to be the end of my attachment soon. franky speaking i have learnt nothing from this experience except for those office people's different kind of attitutde which some i really like, some i feel like killing. ok i have found new friends.. seen more pretty gerls in sp hah~. but i have learnt really nothing. ok done editing video here and there ya.. but nothing more than that besides getting screwed up by Bernie (Mr Plant) for nothing! Ryan was a nice guy.. he's our supervisior which was then replace by our mr chubby Aaron... now little mouse Celeste. she is a freak.. haha but i dont care.. 11 more days and ill say bye2 to corporate communications~~!
i went through alot man during this attachment life. i mean my outside life during this attachment time frame. quarrels can start off without having me to meet my frens for such a long time. people back stabbing behind my back (oh my.. thats so normal).achieving somethings which i never thought i could in the first place. played some shows which i never dreamt of playing like for example.. WOMAD?? oh my.. guest singer.. what a privilage. but thats me living in my evryday life.. some ups some downs.. but the sadest thing happened to me on the 23rd of july 2004... a day i would never forget for the rest of my life.....
it may be irritating for those who read my blog that i keep writing about this. but do i care ? no.. cos i just dont.. nobody knew how he felt, the pain he had inside, the lack of oxygen, half shut eyes, tumour seeping through his rib cage and can be clearly seen by the naked eye. nobody felt his pain. no one.
ur one of the best frens i had in my entire life. we shared evrything. almost evrything. u dint wanna share with me ur pain.. u showed me how strong u were even though ur body was at the most timid stage.. u even made fun about those big needles poking through ur evrywhere on ur timid body.. u lost ur hair.. people made fun of u.. u wud think i felt okay with it cos i was laffing along with u but u were wrong my fren.. deep inside i was always sad for u.. dint wanna show my weakness although others did.. dint wanna show cos i wanted u to be strong even though of ur ilness.. sometimes u do talk about death with me... which i would brush it off.. in fact honestly few weeks before u were going i got a bad feeling that it was gonna be the last few weeks of ur life.. but again i brush that thought off.. i cant cry now cos im fasting.. but my heart is just so shattered the day i lost a fren like u.. till today i can still smiling see u evrywhere and whenever i want to.. but u can never talk back with me.. u cud only afford to smile.. in dikir ur dream was to reach the finals of perdana.. but u were not with us till the end of the maiden voyange.... but we felt u were with us on stage dutring the semis to help us win... we did for u man.. we entered finals.. but i think winning was abit too far for us at the moment.. ur sister wrote for u a little something in ur bday in the guestbook.. u went away just two weeks before ur bday.. hu wud have tot.. they (our family) had oredi planned ur bday party when u were going to be discharged.. but u dint.. sometimes when i step out of my house , how i wish i could call bobb and he asked him to follow me along visit u at ur hse/ hospital.. but.. how i just wished..u wud think that i have forgetton about u.. this coming friday will already be 13 weeks ur frens, family have not seen u.. next saturday will be ur 100th day away.. .. i just cant take it when ur mum just come crying to me and hugs me.. it really breaks me down.. just cant see her cry.. it just reminds me of the moemnt u took ur last breath while holding my hand.. that memory will be at the back of my head for a very long time to come... one day i will join u.. ur family and frens will join u deep down there.. but its up to go God to decide when. i will always pray for u my fren. always... just sad u cant be joining us for this years hari raya...
happy fasting people.
Fasting..
today is the first day of the holy fastibg month for us. and i dunno y people are always suprised when i say that i fast. hello even criminals fast. just dont look down on people ok people.. haha.. kinda happy that its fasting month cos one thing i can lose weight~~ im becoming rounder by the day man.. fasting month came right on time for me. can also reduce my damn smoking. also getting heavier by the day. all fatcs and figures came from resource: CHOW DA EN. hah!
well people another msg or piece of advice.. forgive and forget. dont keep or bottle up anger to urself. its worse than smoking u noe.. bad for heart, for lungs, for brains, for blood cells and for... i dunno.. but its bad. so if u need to shout at someone, then do so. but bear the consequences aite. dont play the game of sarcarsm cos it hit back at you and u wont like it.
hmm so muslims who are fasting.. then happy fasting.. tahan ah..for those who are not, then respect those who are. nearly one.. six more hours. dunno wether to eat at home or at kallang with omar. have oms tonite. will paln later on.. ok take care all.. mick ly and ky if ur reading this.. Welcome back to Singapore!. da.....
DONE!.. I Think...
ok harlow ppl.. those have been asking me " eh y u never blog ah...???" .. ok here is the answer.. Today for the dunno how many times in a year im having fever.. damn.. on a day like this. so hot and im feeling feverish.. how do u think it feels like. but suddenly now i think im getting better. haha dunno what im talkign about.. getting crazy.. brain fried by the fever.
OK! on to the competition we had last this past sunday.. ok we started of the day by going to Azman's grave lot and read some prayers for him. was so damn hot and evryone was perspiring like as though in a sauna( i dunno how to spell that word)!! then after which we went to epul's late fathers grave which was quite far from where the bus alighted. but nvm.. we walk through the hot sun. upon reaching there we also read some prayers.. bought flowers.. normal stuff. after that a few steps away from the grave it just started raining like hell.. pouring down cats and dogs. so sudden~! we ran and got lost along the way as the graveyard had many paths. but somehow i backtracked and remembered where the bus were and sprinted there. man we were wet upon reaching kallang theatre. oh ya before epul's late father grave we visited late Rashid's grave near Azman's.
long way to kallang from Choa Chu kang graveyard. but its was a happy ride. nobody wanted to spoil anyone's mood before the big competition time. reached there rehearsed the opening event with other groups and then it we went to our room and got ready. that part evryone in my team was nervous. really nervous... in the room there was this speaker we u cud hear the other teams playing. but soon after i switched off cos i feared that some of my mates would get really scared of the big teams. we braced ourselves up and performed...... in fact the audienced love us. to my pleasent suprised the roared at one pat when i was singing.. haha never felt like that before in dikir. outside shows yes, dikir coms never had people clapped when i sing. was a nice feeling...
and then results time.. so damn scared of the results i went to pee several times.. haha.. what i aimed before the com was to get top 3 and best singer award for my self.. which after i performed i was confident of getting it... and so i was nominated for best singer award.. but i received the best potential singer...... again.. like for the third time. like som eppl say how many times can u be potentially good. is not that im not happy with the reults or what so ever.. but im contented with the results but im not satisfied. he beat me again. ok i respect him cos he manange to beat me even though i was at my best( i think). ok forget bout that... but still we dint get top 3.. quite sad actually after trainig so damn hard for it. but its okay.. my team will never be the same after this national level competition. i realy hope we will be very strong.. very very strong one day. ok enough of competitions..
like some people always say there's always a next time. and i definitely cant wait for the next time.. so till next tim peeps!
